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My main concern in this paper is the tense. I want to make sure the reader understands that the dialogue is in the present tense, and then I tell the story in a narrative in the past tense. Then, the reflection is written in the present tense again. I think the strengths are in the figurative language, but I'm wondering if I should add more metaphors and analogies in the closing paragraph. I tried to use a lot of figurative language and detailed wording in a paragraph, and in the following paragraph, I tried to sum up the reflection in more simple terms. I think this gives the essay a good variety.

Lost In Love Lost; Roaming the unfamiliar streets of Boston with a clear destination but uncertain path. Lost, yet totally complete. Lost, without the desire to find. Lost, with everything. “I have a surprise for you.” I said, teasing my boyfriend with curiousity. “What is it?!” His voiced echoed excitement. The excitement was totally deserved; I knew he would adore this surprise, count down the days until the event, and cherish the memory it would produce. “Shayna can’t go to the Lil Wayne concert with my anymore because she was scheduled to work, and no one is able to take her shift. What are your plans for the 17th of July?” “Nothing planned! Oh my god babe, I would love to go. I feel guilty profiting from Shayna’s loss, but I am so happy and so excited.” We decided to make the event a vacation. We contacted my aunt who lives in Cape Code, about an hour from where the concert was being held, and asked if we could come down on the 16th and stay the night. She eagerly agreed, excited to see me and meet my boyfriend, Will. We packed our bags, threw them in the car, and started heading to Massachusetts. Our first road trip together. After a six hour car ride, we arrived at my aunts house, exhausted. I briefly introduced Will to my aunt and uncle, proudly showing off the amazing person I call my boyfriend. Shortly after arriving, we headed to bed, falling asleep in each others arms. The next day we spent our time walking around the boutique shops, casually window shopping, enjoying each others company. We hit the road, parting from the scenic Cape, and headed to Manchester. When we arrived in Manchester, we checked into the Holiday Inn. We quickly got to the room, unpacked our luggage, and started preparing for the concert. 300 dollars were paid for five hours of an absolutely priceless experience. I saw my favorite artist perform live, about twenty feet away from me, while holding the love of my life’s hand. After the five hours of standing up, dancing around, and screaming until our noise merged into a giant howl from the crowd, we crashed. The next day, we woke up bright and early and headed to Boston. Will and I had planned on going shopping for the day in the vibrant city. Being from a small town in Maine, we weren’t very accustomed to navigating around such a hectic place, and within a couple minutes we were lost. Lost in an unfamiliar city, with limited frame of time, flustered and confused, yet enveloped with paradise. During the whole three hours of blindly wandering the streets of Boston, I was looking back. Concentrating on finding a way was impossible while being lost in my own mind, my own flashback. We had met eight months earlier. The chances of us meeting were slim, but we didn’t meet by mistake. When Will first tried to hang out with me and get to know me, I was hesitant to say the least. I was planning on going out of state for college the next year, and I wasn’t looking for anyone to hold me back from enjoying my college experience. I eventually decided that I could at least have some fun with this new person, and mine as well give him a shot. I had nothing to lose, right? I held back the first couple months with Will. I was afraid of letting him in, opening up, and growing close. Allowing someone in, also provides that someone with the ability to leave. The months past, and my mind changed; I was ready to open new doors, without the knowledge of what lay beyond. I have never been more satisfied with a decision. When I made the decision to open those doors, I was prepared to deal with possible regret, endeniable pain, and a shattering let down, but no negative words relate to our relationship. Not one disagreement, not one argument, and absolutely nothing even close to resembling a fight. We started spending every single day together, and fell asleep every night holding each other every night until slumber embraced us. Our bond became unbreakable. We became connected on a level so deep, we merged into one; a true definition of a couple. I was simply one half of a whole. Our ideas, opinions, belongings, feelings, everything was shared, everything was ours. One human being had the power to unravel a spool full of feelings and emotions I never knew existed. Will broke down a dam, and now all these unexperienced things came flooding into my life. Floods couldn’t phase me, we jumped right in and began to swim, letting the current guide us. As we were scrambling around the streets, trying to find our way home, I realized how far we’d come. A couple months of progress generated a love so robust. I realized I had never known what it felt like to be complete, never known anything totally pure. A world shared. Two lives connected, intwined, and combined in the most perfect of ways. The most intricate puzzles, containing only two pieces, forming one solid picture. I learned the importance of connection, and realized a life without such deep connection would be meaningless. If you are able to connect with someone on the deepest of levels, everything in life has purpose. Connection opens your eyes, and blesses you with the ability to see everything you have. Without that connection, you are blind, you take things for granted, you are unable to appreciate simple happenings. Because of Will, because of our connection, I no longer live in fragments. Every piece of everyday has obvious meaning. Every destination is crystal clear. Every moment with him is cherished. Because of Will, I can see how every piece of life helps make one big picture. No moment lasts forever, but with the connection we share, every moment is strung together with a piece of golden thread. A thread that will never fray. By definition, being lost is having gone astray or missing the way. I was indifferent to finding ‘the way’. I had everything I needed right next to me. It was impossible to feel lost with the love of my life right by my side, holding my hand. I was in an unfamiliar place, with no idea where to go, but I felt completely at home. We were in a hectic city, but I barely noticed the scenery. It doesn’t matter where you are or what the situation is, as long as you’re with someone you love. While lost on the streets of Boston, I realized that Will was all I needed in order to be happy.

i think it was a great paper. I did have a little trouble with the tense but i read it over and it clicked. That was the only issue i had but all in all it was great. We feel as though your paper is really strong. Our only comments are on your transition going into your flashback and coming out of it. The fact that you made the transition so simple does not correspond with the rest of your paper. We feel like you should develop your transitions more and this could make the transfers between the two tenses more cohesive.